Is that a ladyboy you’ve been talking to for the last two hours, plastered out of your senses? Are you sure? How would you know?
I was talking to a girl in Korat one time. It was 3 a.m. I was drunk. The club, had just let out. I was with some friends and we were on the way to the truck when I met this beautiful thin girl that I thought was lovely. I talked to her in English for a while and got her phone number. My friends were envious and coming up to talk to her as well.
My Thai friend stayed back. He told me later that he knew she was a katoey. I thought he was NUTS. She was definitely a woman. The only way to find out was dial the number the next day which I did. A guy with a squeaky voice answered the phone.
Yeah, I was completely fooled after living here for over a year.
Here are a number of ways to help you figure out whether she is a ladyboy or a lady.
And then, you aren’t really going to know until she drops her pants. And then you may STILL not know because if she is a “cut” ladyboy and she spent 100K Thai baht or more on taking away the snake, you aren’t going to know until you are inside her. Maybe by that point the question fades away. Or, it becomes more imperative that it be answered. Up to you.
Even having sex with her you may STILL not know because you might be drunk, or just not been with enough real girls to know the difference. With that said, here’s the checklist… commit it to memory if you’re worried about it. If you are a straight guy and the thought of being with a ladyboy gives you piss-shivers it should be easy to remember this entire list!
Differences in Ladyboy vs. Girl General Anatomy
1. Ladyboys are tall and bigger framed. Their shoulders are usually wider. Ladyboys are guys biologically even when they’re taking the estrogen pills they are STILL producing testosterone, but now in addition to male anatomy they are growing breasts and widening their hips, slimming their stomachs and making their skin more feminine.
Ladyboys usually have male bone structure and muscles. They are naturally toned more firmly than a lady. Try feeling the bicep if you get a chance or shaking hands and squeezing hard – sometimes they’ll squeeze back harder than you and you might have a strong clue right there… Guys rarely have a slender waist and wide hips, however I have seen some of the most PERFECT waists and hips on ladyboys here in Thailand.
2. Adam’s apple – usually ladyboys have one or will be trying to hide it with their hair, clothes, hand, the way they hold their head down, or something else.
3. Ladyboys may have more visible veins in their arms and hands, forehead, or anywhere really. Girls naturally have a higher percentage of fat under their skin which hides veins more. Ladyboys’ veins may show especially on the back of the hand, forearm, temples, and legs.
Many ladyboys play or played football, volleyball, ta-graw or other sports (badminton) and have built up a sports-like body. Girls in Thailand rarely play more than badminton and if they do they aren’t likely to be sporting veins you can see too easily.
4. Have a look at the ladyboy’s waist and hips. Rarely are they picture perfect, but they may be hiding that area with a dress or baggy shirt. Usually a girl will accent that area as it’s naturally nice. A ladyboy with perfect waist and hips will too – a ladyboy without perfect waist and hips will not.
5. Large feet and hands. A large pinky fingernail on their either or both hands signifies a guy since I’ve never seen a girl in Thailand with that. Ever.
6. Strange nipples. You might need to wait until you get him home, but often times you’ll see them right there in the bar. They just aren’t a woman’s nipples.
7. Strange breasts… A man’s body is wider than a girls. Hence, when these men are taking estrogen to make their breasts grow there is a gap between them of just flat chest.
If the breasts are the mountains and the chest is the valley on a girl… then on a ladyboy it’s more like the breasts are the mountain (small mountains in Thailand though) and there’s a PLATEAU between the mountains – not really a valley. Just a flat space that could not be mistaken for cleavage – it’s a flat spot, that’s all.
Ladyboy vs. Girl Behavior
1. When they speak they are quiet. Or, when they speak they have an unnatural voice. Or, when they speak they don’t have an even flowing sort of voice. It’s “not smooth tones connecting into smooth tones” if that makes any sense at all.
Their voice is not fluid. Their bass level is not smooth – meaning that sometimes certain words or phrases or reactions to things that you say, or their laugh – may all the sudden get very bassy – a deep sound emanating from this petite sweetheart that doesn’t make sense.
2. Coughing and sneezes. If you hear a ladyboy cough – it’s something that is very hard to do in a female fashion. They HAVE the big vocal cords like a man and so the cough sometimes has a very deep bass sound that cannot be easily hidden if it’s a real cough. A sneeze also – sometimes a ladyboy cannot sneeze like a girl.
3. Laughing. Again, another hard thing to fake, but if it’s a fake laugh it’s easy to fake the tone of it to make you think it’s feminine. If it’s a real hearty laugh – you may get a glimpse of the guy behind the disguise as it will be a deep, bassy laugh.
4. Ladyboys typically speak English better than the Thai girls in Thailand. I’m guessing that the ladyboys speak English to each other more when they are amongst themselves.
They seem to be better focused on the business aspect of sex for cash. They seem to understand that the better they speak English the better they’ll be able to make money. In addition to this, I think most ladyboys start their behavior in high-school. I’ve taught enough of them to know them when I see them.
Most know they’ll be ladyboys by 16 years old. I think they too might have the idea of being a “superstar” ladyboy in Pattaya, Bangkok, Patong or Chiang Mai and know that knowing English and being able to interact with foreigners is a ticket to being able to make more cash. The ladyboys I’ve taught in school seemed to have a good command of English and be able to speak it at a higher level than the average student.
5. When ladyboys and girls are looking for they are looking for guys (dates) they go about it differently… the ladyboys that are looking are almost always more obvious about it – not shy, quiet or covert like the Thai women.
If you are looking at a Thai woman with an “interest” she will know quickly – and you may not even see her at the point of discovering you watching her. They are so expert. So too are the ladyboys, but if a ladyboy catches you looking at her even 1 time and even for the slightest bit longer than what might be a casual glance he will let you know he saw you by meeting your eyes and by not letting you out of his sites until he has made eye contact and assessed what your intentions are.
If you already know it’s a ladyboy and you don’t want to have a conversation it’s best to NEVER look at the ladyboy again because he WILL come over or do something to get your attention and conversation.
Even if you DON’T make any more glances in his direction he may still come over and make the first move to come and talk to you. A girl might rarely do this, but a girl does not have the balls so to speak, to go up to guys that she thinks looked at her. A ladyboy does, and probably will.
Like I said, a ladyboy is business focused. He KNOWS that if you’re even half interested he can get some money out of you. A girl doesn’t have the confidence to be as manipulative outright – she does it in a much different, and maybe more potent way… playing you like a marionette.
6. Ladyboys are more aggressive with each other – more catty. More confrontational. They are louder with each other and make jokes about each other – causing each other to lose face more often – and they are more forgiving of it with each other because the ladyboys are afraid of fighting each other. They are NOT afraid of fighting a girl or a farang for some reason.
I guess they know a girl cannot beat them and a farang typically WON’T beat them because there’s something in our in-grained behavior about punching a person in a dress in the mouth. It’s hard to do even if we KNOW it’s a technically a guy with equipment.
7. Ladyboys dress really well. Often they are better dressed than ANY woman in Thailand will be. They go the extra mile to overdress. Whereas the typical girl will dress casually but maybe with a nice shirt. Or maybe just a nice pair of pants.
They typically don’t NEED to do any more than that because they’ll still find dates. A ladyboy goes the whole way, heels, tight pants, tight shirt, bra that’s stuffed, hair done.
8. Ladyboys wear FAR more makeup than girls wear. If you’re wearing a dark shirt try to get her face up against your sleeve once and then check when she’s not looking if your sleeve turned white. Check the white to make sure, baby powder – which might indicate a girl more times than a ladyboy or, makeup as in some kind of coverup makeup that is liquidbased and smears which would more times than not I’d say indicate a ladyboy’s makeup.
9. Men have a shorter one. Here is one way I learned from an expert in Patong Beach. This guy owned multiple bars and some of them employed cut ladyboys as dancers.
We were out on the town one night and he told me his one favorite way to pick out a ladyboy that most people don’t use. He looks for an upper arm – humerus – I think it’s called – that is shorter in proportion to a girl’s upper arm. Men have a shorter one. Girls usually have a longer one.
This is why when you see a girl with a short upper arm it makes you feel strange – and the girl is not that attractive… to me anyway. If I see a girl with a short upper arm I think there is something very strange about her and I’m instantly turned-off by her.
10. One thing you’ll probably NEVER see a Thai girl do that a ladyboy WILL do is pull out her breast in the bar or anywhere remotely public. A ladyboy is proud of them and doesn’t really feel the stigma attached to baring a breast in Thai society because he didn’t grow up with breasts – they are estrogen induced or bought.
You will also never, ever, EVER see a real girl squirt milk from her nipple in a public place but a ladyboy will pop you in the eye with it if you’re not careful.
Hope that clears it up! With all of those tips you should be able to figure out 99.9x% of ladyboys vs. girls. There is always that one that will trip you up though.